7 Tips for Getting Through Tough Times!

Let´s face it, no matter how much we work on ourselves and no matter how well we are doing, life can sometimes hit hard.

When it does it is important to get back on track quickly and take the important steps to steer your ship in the right direction.

Sometimes this is easier said than done, especially if you don´t know how. Today I want to show you some very effective tools to heal yourself and get through dark times!

Here are the magic words:

Self Care, self care, self care!

Self care is paramount!

It is THE number one thing you have to focus on, even if it is the last thing on your mind!

You have to make yourself the biggest priority and love yourself with everything you got!

Just think and feel the following affirmations:

I love and accept myself just the way I am!

Even if my life is a mess right now and I am in pain I deeply love and accept it!

I will grow from it! I will get stronger because of it!

Can you feel the strength rising from within?

It's a very powerful energy. It's the warrior within.

Acceptance of what IS is the first step on your healing journey! Write these affirmations out and tape them to your mirror!

Now let's check out some other things that will help you to jumpstart your life again!

1. Exercise!

BOOM! Number one on the list has to be exercise! Literally it is the best thing you can do for yourself to help you to feel better quickly.

If you are feeling so down that it seems like an impossible task, just make it your goal to only 'show up' at the gym!

Once you are there, you will start to do the exercises and work out more and more.

If you are not used to it, babystep it.

When you get over the initial resistance of working out while you are in a depressive mood, you will start to enjoy it and it will bring you out of it bit by bit.

Exercise releases all kind of happy chemicals and you are doing something good for yourself, which is an active affirmation of self love! This is what we want!

2. Stop self medicating!

Even though it might be tempting to use external substances like alcohol to feel better it's better to resist that urge and get off any form of self medication as soon as possible. Do it radically and face your inner demons.

Alcohol or any other drug might give a temporary relief but they make things worse in the long run and can lead to a severe depression.

Realize that the urge to drink, smoke or party are all forms of an inner attempt to self medicate inner pain!

The problem with these 'false medications' is that the actual pain or inner wound cannot heal because you are treating the symptom instead of allowing an actual healing process to occur.

Once you let go of any self medication and face the pain head on, accept it and befriend it, instead of running away from it, the healing process begins!

Pain belongs to life. There is even a beauty to the process of facing it head on. It empowers you like nothing else, you will see.

3. Talk with your friends!

To be in the company of family and your friends will help to sort out your thoughts and there is nothing more healing than love and good company! Don't isolate yourself.

4. Designate time to experience grief if you have experienced the loss of someone!

When you are taking over by the emotion of grief or any other emotion and it incapicates you here is a very healthy way to let these feelings out.

Set an alarm in the middle of the night for example at 3am, wake up in your bed, turn on a little light or a candle and allow yourself to go through whatever emotions come up.

At this special time cry and do whatever it takes to let your emotions flow.

Set a time limit for 30 minutes and after the time is up go back to sleep.

Do this regularly every night.

By designating a special time out of time (in the middle of the night in between sleeping periods) you separate your grieving process from your day. This will help you to not feel overwhelmed during the day. After doing this a couple of times your body and subconscious mind will understand that you are taking care of your emotional healing at YOUR time and under YOUR conditions instead of letting the emotions take over your life so it will help you to do just that!

5. Gratitude Stretch

As counterintuitive as it sounds especially in times of depression, pain or heartache you have to work on developing an attitude of gratitude.

In order to do this I give you a very powerful exercise that will help you to recondition your mind and change your perceptiual filters so you start to notice more and more of the good things in your life even though you have been through a tough time.

Every day, in the morning after you wake up sit down with a little notebook and write down 10 things in your life that you are grateful for.

For example:

I am grateful that I have a roof over my head.

I am grateful for my new shoes.

I am grateful that I am alive and healthy.

I am grateful for my friends.

etc...etc.

While writing your list really start to feel how grateful you are for all the good things in your life! Be grateful for the simple things in your life.

When you get it you will feel a deep sense of coming home. It's all about the little things.

If you can't find anything at first, always remember that things could be worse. Your death hasn't touched you yet.

This will help you to program your subconscious mind to focus on the positive things in your life, which are ALWAYS there, but only need to be brought to your attention!

6. Journaling

I am a huge advocator of keeping a journal. It helps to manifest the things you want to bring into your life and it is a great tool to design your epic new future!

Use your journal to write down your goals, where you want to be in your development at at a certain date! Become your own motivational coach and write as if you are speaking to yourself! This acts as a direct channel to your subconscious mind. You are basically giving your subconscious mind instructions on where you are heading!

Here are a few simple rules to keep in mind:

• Always write in the positive! You dont want to give your unconscious mind negative instructions.

• Write in the present tense! You want to create a positive reality that is happening now. Not in some distant future. Your unconscious mind gets it if you write in the present tense. Otherwise your goals will always stay in the future and you will not reach them.

• Don't use negation!

You see, your unconscious mind cannot process negatives. For example:

Don't think of a red cat!

To process negation your unconscious mind has to bring up the image of the red cat in the first place. We don't want that. So find words that describe yourself positively instead of using 'I don't want this' or 'I am not' use sentences like 'I am' and 'I feel' etc.

The more you write in your journal the more instructions your unconscious mind receives from you and the better it can help you to make the changes you need to make!

See your unconscious mind as a loving friend! By journaling you open a direct communication with it!

And here is the most important part: Have fun with it! Really feel your new positive affirmations with every cell of your body as you write in your journal! The more positive feelings you can create while doing this the more powerful this ritual becomes!

7. Allow yourself to feel your emotions!

Be aware that whatever you resist persists. When you are in pain the quickest way to heal is to allow all the emotions come up and be with them. This is the essence of self love and self care.

Tough times can be a very powerful teaching time because it is in these times that we learn to self sooth and self care.

How would you treat your own child when it is in pain?

This is the question you gota ask yourself and apply it to yourself.

You would be present and you would listen. Being with your emotions and allowing yourself to feel them is being that loving presence towards yourself, your healing attention you give to yourself in order to heal.

It is very powerful and a beautiful process.

When you are allowing your emotiosn to simply be and not try to run away from them, they simply run out eventually. They pass through you.

Also start to get into a dialogue with your inner child. Tell your inner child (subconscious/emotional body) that you are there for him/her.

"Dear one (or other endearing term) we got this, we will get through this and I am going to be there for you and will never leave you again."

This practice has many layers and is at the core of what I teach in some of my Coaching modules. It is something that is not really taught in society. In my view this stuff should be taught in school.

Again the keywords to to all of these points above are self care and self love. Along with a regular exercise regimen, loads of water and healthy nutrition you will pick yourself up very quickly!

Just focus on these basics and incorporate them into your life.

Always rememer every tough time passes eventually.

The nicer you are to yourself the faster you will heal and get better. Every hard time can teach us something, mostly it teaches us how to deeply love ourselves. If you take that step and get the lesson you will emerge like a phoenix from the ashes and bring with you a great strength!

Believe me, you will get through this if you follow and incorporate the steps above!

Much love and

talk to you soon,

Oliver